Day 5

It's been 5 days and 4 nights so far without Jake. 

I hate it. 

Mostly I just hate being in a house alone. At night. When it's dark. 

BUT I have amazing friends who have been taking such good care of me! I haven't cooked for myself at all this whole time and it's because of their generosity that I'm not going crazy. 

Since Jake left I have been cleaning cleaning cleaning. My house is bare. Only thing left to get out is a bed and a dresser. Hopefully the bishop can round up some good missionaries to come and help out. My mom and I aren't as strong as we should be ha ha. 

I also signed up for Paparazzi Jewelry! That means I sell Jewelry! I'm so excited to start parties and to see people get excited over how cute the items are because I am so excited! It's going to be great! And best part about it is I can go anywhere with it and since I'm a military wife that means I will be all over this world! 

Anyway, back to today. The here and now. 

I'm doing ok. Today I drove past the gym on base and got a tight chest because the day before Jake got called to go we went and worked out together. We also always rode our bikes around that area. But other than things reminding me or me sitting and just thinking about it, I'm doing ok. I stay busy with cleaning and taking care of my dog that I really get surprised how fast the day goes by.

I can't lie, I'm excited for my mom to show up tomorrow. I hate being in this house alone, and it's been hard for me to sleep. 

Tomorrow is the pre inspection for the house. I have to have everything pretty much perfect. Luckily, I still have until Thursday with the actual inspection. 

Thursday is when I move back to Utah and my life there begins. 

I end a life in one place just to pick up an old one. 

Kind of bittersweet. 

I miss Jake so much. He is doing really well though in his training. He loves everything he is learning and I know he is going to be amazing with his job once he is in the field. I cannot express how proud of him enough. I will always be proud of him. I love him so much and he is so amazing. I couldn't be happier than I am because he is so perfect and treats me like a Queen! I am so lucky to have an amazing guy like him. He is so excited to serve his country and do his duty! I love him!